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The male journey and its perils: A free BBQ night for all men on Monday 11 June

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The opening lines of Dante Alighieri’s 13th century masterpiece The Divine Comedy read: “In the middle of the road of my life I awoke in a dark wood, where the true way was wholly lost.”This is the great (yet often terrifying) invitation of a man’s life, and our society – and organised religion – offer few answers.On Monday 11…

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True Self False Self: Discovering our core identity

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The False SelfThere is a version you that you identify with as who you actually are, but it is a complete fiction. It doesn’t actually exist, except within your mind. This is the place of universal addiction, the self-referential, self-defending, self-promoting, self-defeating, self-condemning, endlessly relating-to-everything-from-yourself-as-the-reference-point story you started writing from the first moment you experienced your first flash…

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The Hero’s Journey

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Shakespeare’s words from Macbeth remind us of the journey towards futility that many men find themselves in mid-life:To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,Creeps in this petty pace from day to dayTo the last syllable of recorded time,And all our yesterdays have lighted foolsThe way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor playerThat struts…

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Travelling Light

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Martin Buber said that all living is meeting. There is an invisible space that holds all the energy between all things, that holds all things in relationship with one another, even within our own lives. Galaxies are in relationship with one another, as are subatomic particles. Nothing is independent, alone. To be a hermetically sealed singularity would be…

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Life As A Tree

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There is an odd thing about nature; everything is quite adept at being what it is, except humans.I look out at everything growing so wild and faithfully beneath the sky and wonder why we are the one terrible part of creation privileged to refuse our flowering.(David Whyte)The problem with understanding why we make ourselves so complicated is not…

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Life As A Tree: Free BBQ night on Monday 10th April

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One of the best models for understanding how we connect with and how we avoid our lives is the metaphor of a tree. The problem is, most people believe that we are what we think, say and do, what we know, our attitudes and so on. Although this is where life and energy resides, represented by the branches and the leaves,…

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Living Free of the White Male System

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In 1972, Ann Wilson Schaef, an American psychotherapist, coined the phrase “white male system.” which is a consciousness that she says infects everyone living in western society. It’s a very addictive way of thinking and feeling that imprisons us, but we don’t know it exists because of how clever the system is. Imagine a prison cell with four…

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